Taming Those Awful Tantrums Excepted from Perfect Parenting

Question: Yes, yes, I know, "Temper tantrums are a normal childhood
reaction to anger and frustration." Knowing this does not make it easier
when my daughter's ballistic contortions are punctuated by her piercing
screams. There has got to be a way to end this agony! Ideas, please!

Think about it: You're right, it's normal for children to have tantrums.
But your response to them will determine if they keep having them and
having them and having them.

Create a "Tantrum Place": Let your child know in advance that all
tantrums will take place in one specific room, such as her bedroom, the
bathroom or the laundry room. When a tantrum starts, you can escort your
child to the "tantrum room" with one brief comment: "You can come out when
you're done." If she comes out of the room, and she's still having the
tantrum, just lead her back repeating, "You can come out when you're done."
At first your child may spend the whole day in the tantrum room, but she'll
quickly find out that tantrums are no fun without an audience!

Help develop self-control: If your child has tantrums and can't seem to
calm herself down, it's best to teach her how to control herself. Do this
by enveloping her in a hug and rocking her with soothing words, "It's okay.
Calm down." When the tantrum is winding down, distract her by washing her
face or giving her a drink of water. Do not give in to the child's original
request, and stay calm yourself. At a quiet time, begin to teach your child
what to do when she gets angry (what words and actions are appropriate).

Take away the audience: As long as your child's tantrum is not dangerous to
her or to property, feel free to say, "I'm leaving the room. Come and get
me when you're done." And do just that. Busy yourself with something else,
and wait patiently for your child to calm down.

Big-kid tantrums? Make an agreement with an older child who displays
tantrum behavior that when she starts to lose control, you're going to ask
her to go to her room to cool off. If she doesn't go immediately to her
room when asked, she will lose a privilege (decide in advance what that
might be -- telephone, TV, bike riding, for example) or she'll be assigned
an extra chore. This is, of course, in addition to the fact that she still
gets to go to her room to calm down.

Use distraction: When you see your child beginning to lose control,
distract her before the tantrum can turn into a full-blown outburst.

Preventative measures: Avoid tantrums by offering your child choices.
Instead of saying, "Get ready for bed right now," which may provoke a
tantrum, offer a choice, "What would you like to do first, put on your
pajamas or brush your teeth?" In addition, you may be able to elude
tantrums by avoiding the situations that most likely set your child off,
such as allowing her to become overtired, overhungry or overstimulated.

Take note: If your child has frequent intense tantrums it would be wise to
talk with your pediatrician, a counselor or a family therapist.

Wait! Wait! I have another question: Handling tantrums at home is one
thing. But what about in public? My child yells, stomps, screams and throws
his body onto the floor when he doesn't get his way. He does this in public
places, like the grocery store, toy store or restaurant -- anywhere there's
an interested audience. I feel like my hands are tied when everyone's
watching us.

Think about it: The first time your child acted this way in public, you
were probably caught off guard. In your embarrassment, you did everything
you could to stop the tantrum. If you had looked closely, you would have
seen a little twinkle appear in your child's eye as he realized he had
discovered a new way to get what he wants.

Prepare in advance: Use a preventive approach by reviewing desired behavior
prior to entering a public building. "Eric, we're going into the toy store
now. We are going to buy a birthday gift for Troy. We are not buying
anything for ourselves today. If you see something you like, let me know,
and I'll put it on your wish list. I want you to remember to walk beside me
and keep your hands to yourself."

Be reasonable: While you may be concentrating on your tasks, your child has
been shoved in and out of his car seat and ushered from place to place
enduring endless hours looking at grown-up knees. You may be able to
prevent tantrums by bringing along a toy or snack to keep your child
occupied. Also, get him involved by having him select groceries, find the
shoe store, read the menu to you or any other "busy work." The positive
attention and focused activity will keep him too busy to worry about having
a tantrum.

Get out of dodge: When a tantrum starts, put your face next to your child's
ear and announce, "Stop now or we go out to the car." If he doesn't stop,
pick him up or lead him to the car. Sit him in the back seat while you
stand outside the door (or, in foul weather, sit in the front seat and
pointedly ignore him). An alternative to the car is to find a secluded
bench or quiet corner. If he doesn't stop quickly, and you can change your
schedule, go home. Send him to his room for a specified time (about 3
minutes for every year of age, for example, or 15 minutes for a 5 year
old.) The extra time it takes to do this once or twice will establish great
credibility and can save you from many painful hours at the mall with an
obstinate teenager.

Get HIS attention: Get eye level with your child and say, "Follow me."
Break eye contact and begin to walk away. Walk slowly where he can see you.
Many children will follow. If yours doesn't, stop a short distance away and
wait, pretending interest in something else, while you wait. After a few
minutes pass, and your child has calmed down, you can approach your child,
hold him by the hand, and say, "Let's go now."

Use a poker face. Deal with it later: Stand above your child with arms
crossed and a stern face. Say nothing. When the tantrum is over, complete
your errands. When you return home, announce that since your child had a
tantrum while you were out, he will suffer a consequence now (no dessert
after dinner, staying inside, missing his TV show or going to bed early).
Do this once, then use it as your "ace in the hole." At the next public
tantrum say, "Stop now or you will stay inside when we get home, like you
did last week." You child will remember and know you mean business.

Set up a training session: If public tantrums are a regular occurrence,
plan a training session. Go to the grocery store. Buy a few staples and put
a nice assortment of your child's favorite goodies in the cart (potato
chips, ice cream and cookies). Walk around long enough for your child to
have the expected tantrum. Walk the cart over to the register and announce
to the cashier that you'll have to leave the groceries and go home because
your child is misbehaving. (Smile at the cashier and she'll probably smile
back, happy to see at least one customer controlling her child!) Then go
home. Your child will most likely comment on the loss of the goodies. Just
say, "Oh, well, some other time." Expect great, loud unhappiness, but
long-term value!

If all else fails: After an unpleasant experience, plan an outing and leave
your child at home with a baby sitter. Explain that the tantrum she had the
day before is the reason why she is staying home. Expect crying, screaming
and pleading, but be firm. Doing this once has an impact that lasts a long
time.

by Elizabeth Pantle

Developing A Great Character

By: Brian Tracy

Being the Best In Every Area
What is character? Your character is the degree to which you live your life
consistent with high, life-enhancing values. A person who lacks character
is one who compromises on higher order values in favor of lower order
expedience, or who has no values at all. Your adherence to what you believe
to be right and true is the real measure of the person you have become to
this moment.

Define What "Excellence" Means to You
Let us say that one of your values is "excellence." Your definition of
excellence could be, "Excellence means that I set the highest standards for
myself in everything I do. I do my very best in every situation and under
all circumstances. I constantly strive to be better in my work, and as a
person in my relationships. I recognize that excellence is a life-long
journey and I work every day to become better and better in everything I do."

Organize Your Actions
With a definition like this, you have a clear organizing principle for your
actions. You have set a standard by which you can evaluate your behavior.
You have created a framework within which you can make decisions. You have
a measuring rod against which you can compare yourself in everything you
do. You can continually grade your activities in terms of "more" or "less."
You have a clear target to aim at and organize your work around.

Decide What You Want for Your Family
It's the same with each of your other values. If your value is your family,
you could define this as, "The needs of my family take precedence over all
other concerns. Whenever I have to choose between the happiness, health and
well being of a member of my family, and any other interest, my family will
always come first."

Keep Focused
From that moment onward, it becomes easier for you to choose. Your family
comes first. Until you have fully satisfied the needs of your family, no
other time requirement will side track you into a lower value activity.

Shape Your Own Character
The wonderful thing about values clarification is that it enables you to
take charge of developing and shaping your own character. When your values
and goals, your inner life and your outer life, are in complete alignment,
you feel terrific about yourself. You enjoy high self-esteem. Your
self-confidence soars.

When you achieve complete congruence between your values and your goals,
like a hand in a glove, you feel strong, happy, healthy and fully
integrated as a person. You develop a kind of courage that makes you
completely unafraid to make decisions and take action. Your whole life
improves when you begin living your life by the values that you most admire.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do to put this ideas into action immediately.

First, create a clear, written description of your values and what they
mean to you. From that point on, resolve to live consistent with your own
definition.

Second, discipline yourself to live in complete alignment with the values,
virtues and qualities that are most important to you. This is the key to
character.

Why Trying to Fix Him or Her Never Works

Did you know that the most common mistake women make is to marry a man with
the intention of making him over into the man she hopes he will become. The
paradox in this make over attempt is that even if successful, it can't
really work.

If he was still a child at heart when they married, he probably married her
because he needed mothering. And if she succeeds in her attempt to make a
man out of him, he will no longer need a mother. He must then fly the coup
in order to find someone who will be a closer match for who he is now
BEING. This happens in marriages more often than you might imagine.

In one case I remember, the subject of the makeover attempt, strayed from
the nest to have an affair with a younger woman. When he came "back to
Mama" confessing his sins, saying "I'm sorry'", she wouldn't accept his
apology. She considered him damaged goods and refused to accept him back
into the nest. She assumed the role of "the wife betrayed," a "poor me" victim.

Her victim story: "I spent years making him over into the man I wanted him
to be, and now that I've succeeded, he has betrayed my trust by going to
bed with another woman." She never forgave him and the marriage quite
naturally ended in divorce.

This woman made several mistakes (in my opinion).

She didn't marry the man for who he was, but for who she thought he could
become.

She made him wrong in the process of trying to make him into "Mr. Right"
and he therefore didn't really like himself that much when with her.

When he sought elsewhere for the approval he needed, but couldn't find with
her, she refused to see that she had any responsibility whatsoever in what
happened to their marriage.

She took the stand, "I'm right / he's wrong," thereby becoming the victim
of his straying from the nest. I hope you can see this as the victim story
it is.

Notice that her love for him had conditions. That's not real love. "Love,
(my definition) is the space we create for each other to be who we are."
That's the definition of unconditional love and it's also God's love for you.

One of the key elements necessary to a loving relationship is, "Your
significant other must like him or herself when with you." If you're trying
to "fix" your relationship partner with a make over, you're sending a
message that he or she is not okay the way he or she is. That person won't
feel loved and won't like him/herself when with you.

It doesn't take rocket-science to predict the outcome of your relationship
if either party doesn't like him/herself when with the other.

You'd be wise to realize that any attempt to make over your significant
other would just naturally be doomed from the start. The only sure way to
change him or her would be to change yourself first. If you have a
relationship problem, ask yourself, "Who would I be BEING if that were no
longer a problem."

One of the wisest ways of looking at this question is to realize that you
probably needed the problem as a stepping stone for growing. At least
that's been my experience with the problems I've faced and been able to
rise above. Without our problems, there'd be no growing!

Hope that helps.

Please get that all relationship problems get solved, only after you've
made the BEING shift that would change your perspective on the perceived
problem.

Author: Darel Rutherford

12 Easy Ways to Organize your Work or Home Life (or both!)

I admit it! Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the seemingly endless
streams of paperwork. Emails I want to keep, Ezines or sections
of them, ideas I found on the Internet, school papers, notes of
ideas that popped into my head as I was waiting to have a tooth
filled, newspaper clippings ... EEEK! I would file and file and
file and then forgot where that article was that I needed to
complete the project that was due last Thursday!

I have been an avid list-maker all my life out of necessity,
juggling a 9 to 5 work life, family time, a home business and
taking care of two houses; as well as having a number of hobbies
such as cartooning and fine art, clothing design and creation,
crafts and ballroom dancing (at one point in my life even being
a competitive ballroom dancer for 5 years as well as an
assistant disk jockey for parties). (no stress!)

For all of you super-busy people I have put together some handy
hints on getting your life in order and keeping your sanity.

1) Notables: Keep a small notebook and pen handy, wherever you
are, to jot down ideas or appointments or things to do instead
of trying to remember them later on.

2) Telephonery: Set a time limit to each phone call and make
sure you tell your caller. That way you save yourself the stress
of trying to end the phone call and it also helps the caller to
condense the information they want you to hear.

3) In Waiting Use waiting time at the dentist, meeting with your
boss or while waiting on your roast to cook to catch up on
reading or planning, or use the time to tidy up, filing or other
tasks.

4) Help Wanted: Be sure to offer praise to a subordinate, co-
worker or to a member of the family for any effort you've
noticed - they'll be happy to help you when you're bogged down.

5) Don't Put It Off! If you procrastinate you'll only get
stressed out when you think about that hateful "to do" item on
your list. You'll blow it out of proportion in your mind and
it'll become almost impossible to accomplish. Make sure you
tackle the largest or most disliked job first, dividing it up
into manageable tasks, then the other jobs will be a breeze!

6) Control Bug Delegate the tasks you have no time for or team
up with someone who can help you. (see tip #4!)

7) Group Effort Save time and footwork by collecting everything
to bring with you to complete errands or to distribute in each
room of the house instead of making too many trips. Make a fast
list while planning out your route and be sure to plan each stop
along the way so you don't have to backtrack and lose time.

8) Schedule Fun Time! Make sure you include some personal time
for YOU. Allot some time in your agenda - make an appointment
for yourself and keep it, even if it's only a leisurly 20 minute
bubble bath or a 15 minute walk in the fresh spring air!

9) Space Freebies Go through any old unneeded files to free up
space in your filing system.

10) Once and Only Once Each piece of paper should be handled
only once. Read it and either file it, redirect it to someone
else, schedule it or toss it. Don't add it to an ever-ending
pile on your desk in hopes that you'll get to it eventually.

11) Post-Master Use sticky notes to write errands needed to be
done. Stick them to your front door to remind you as you're
headed out.

12) Systems Engineer Too much time is wasted everyday on
searching for things. Find a system that works for you and your
lifestyle and apply it. Use it religiously and you'll find new
time slots you thought you never had!

Author: Heather Diodati

KIDS BEWARE ON THE INTERNET

There are a lot of fun and educational things for children to do
on the Internet. There are also a lot of people and web sites,
so you need to be careful about where you do your surfing. It's
a rosy world out there and there's bubbling excitement to enter
into a Chat Room or log on to a Messenger Program and interact
with people and E-mail them too. Here are some rules to remember
whenever you are online.

# Do not give out any personal information such as address,
telephone number, the name and location of your school, or the
work address / telephone number of your parents, without
permission from your parents

# Do not respond in any way to messages that are mean or that
make you feel uncomfortable. Ignore the sender and end all
communication. It is not your fault if you get a message like
that and if you do, tell your parents right away so that they
can contact the service provider.

# Do not to click on any links that are contained in e-mail from
anyone you don't know. Such links could lead to inappropriate
web sites

# Tell your parents immediately if you come across any
information that makes you feel uncomfortable

# Do not enter contests without asking your parents first

# Always check with your parents before downloading any programs
to your computer

# Never send a person your picture or anything else without
first checking with your parents that this is all right

# Never agree to meet with someone you have "met" online without
permission from your parents.

# Do not give out your Internet passwords to anyone (even best
friends), other than your parents

# Talk with your parents so that you can set up rules for going
online. Decide with your parents when you can be online, the
length of time you can be online, and appropriate areas for you
to visit. Do not access other areas or break these rules without
their permission. If you agree to these ground rules with your
parents, there is no reason for you to get into trouble. You may
also get 'Blocked sites' features like Krowser to make you surf
through inspected sites.

Follow these rules, they are not there to stop you having fun,
they are there to make sure you are safe online. Be a good
online citizen and do not do anything that hurts other people or
is against the law. Always treat others on the Internet the way
you want to be treated.

Author: ilaxi

Personalized Birthday Announcement for Your Child

Personalized Birthday Announcement for Your Child

Your child's birthday is a day that friends and relatives love to
celebrate. Unfortunately not all of them can be around then. Either they
live far away, or they are busy with their own immediate family or work.
Regardless, they would still enjoy receiving a picture of your child to
commemorate the occasion.

I suppose you could crank off a picture on your ink-jet printer and send it
to Grandma, but it would last about a week or two before it began to fade
and/or get torn up. The next place for that picture would be the trash. If
the friend or relative has e-mail you could send a picture to them via the
internet, but it would get viewed a few times and be relegated to some
obscure file on you D drive, never to be seen again.

Why not sent a birthday announcement that will last and be seen on a
regular basis? I'm talking about an inexpensive
refrigerator magnet. Have the manufacturer print a photo of your child on
it with the date and his name below it. How about a larger magnet with a
picture from each previous birthday in order to show how he has grown over
the years?

Why Send a Magnetic Birthday Announcement?
Refrigerator magnets last for years, and they find themselves adhering to
busy places in the home and office. They get viewed daily, so the recipient
can think of the birthday child all the time. They sure beat the dickens
out of a plain ol' photograph stuck in an envelope. Give the important
people in your child's life a birthday announcement magnet that they will
enjoy for a long time.

About the author:
Andrew has been writing articles for years. Previously he wrote a monthly
article on 2-way radios and police scanners, a stint that lasted for four
years. He enjoys riding his Harley, painting cars and motorcycles, and
spending time with his wife and kids. Recently a friend asked him to write
for her business called Fresh Impressions. Check out their <b>Birthday
Announcements.

Author: Andrew Barber
http://freshimpressions.us/birthday.cfm

Top 5 Benefits of Home Organization

Top 5 Benefits of Home Organization

You can change your life just by getting your home organized.

Let's take a look at five areas of your life that will improve

if you just organize your home.

1. Improved relationships This one is probably the biggest one.

Think about all of the fights that you have with your spouse or

significant other about your home organization issues. Perhaps

the problem is that mail is tossed on the kitchen table each

day. Maybe it is that you can never find the car keys when it is

time to leave. Consider the arguments with your children about

schoolwork that gets put in the entryway or kitchen counter.

Organizing your home and getting your spouse and kids on board

can have a significant impact in the quality of your

relationships with them. I have found that less yelling and more

quality time with my daughter is the biggest benefit of home

organization for me.

2. Better health Chronic stress over a long period of time can

lead to significant health issues. Some ways that your body

shows stress is: headaches, neck and shoulder tension,

backaches, and upset stomach (source: webmd.com). Take an

inventory. How many of these health issues do you have in your

life on a repeated basis? It could be that they are linked to

the state of disorganization in your home. Think about all of

the home organization challenges that you have right now. Does

just thinking about them have you tensing up? Think about how

much better you will feel just by taking some time to organize

your home.

3. More free time This one goes hand-in-hand with number 5 (more

money). Consider the amount of time that you waste each day

looking for things in your home. That missing sock, those jeans

your daughter loves that you can't seem to find anywhere, not to

mention the car keys that get lost more times than you care to

remember. Have you ever stopped to really take an inventory of

the sheer amount of time that you spend looking for things? Use

home organization to help you get that time back. At that point,

you can do things that you want to do.

4. More space in your home Because part of every home

organization project is getting rid of stuff, having more space

in your home is a natural result. If you're tripping over the

stuff that you have in your home right now because it doesn't

have a place to live in your space, getting your home organized

will "create" space in your home that you never knew even

existed. Just getting rid of the things you don't want or need

anymore can create a wonderful new energy in your home and in

your life.

5. More money If you own your own business, this may be the

biggest benefit of home organization for you. How much do you

make in an hour? For the sake of illustration, let's say that

you make $30 per hour. How much time do you spend in a day

looking for your keys, your checkbook, the shoes to match that

outfit, etc? Again, for the purpose of illustration, let's say

you spend 30 minutes per day. So you not organizing your home is

costing you $15 per day, $105 per week, $420 per month, and

$5,040 per year. Pretty significant, isn't it? So a little home

organization could potentially save you over $5,000 every year.

Author: Jill Borash

Why you need to be Home Business Owner

We all have our own tastes, styles and preferences when it comes to how we

dress, style our hair, even what we drive, and one of the great things

about running a business from the comfort of home is that we can be

exactly who we are with no need to impress anyone.

 

Like you, I have personal preferences.  I love the fact that I can work in

my PJs during the early hours of the day while I coach overseas clients,

and comfortable gym clothes or shorts and a T-shirt during the day.

 

It’s great that working from home gives us this freedom to dress as we

choose, but it’s also important to recognize that this is where it stays -

at home.

 

When you’re out in the community or meeting with clients or prospects, put

your personal preferences aside and shift your thinking to image

management.

 

Whether it’s fair or not, image is critical. How someone perceives you is

going to determine whether or not they will do business with you.

 

Psychologists have learned that most people will förm an impression of you

in the first four minutes and that 80 percent of that impression is based

on nonverbal data.

 

What you say has very little impact compared to your visual appearance.

 

Just like changing packaging for a product can mean the difference between

boom or bust, the same can be applied to your physical packaging.

 

When I met my accountant for the first time, I was stunned.  He came out

of his office in his socks, his shirt was hanging out of his pants and he

had no tie.  His hair was disheveled and he looked like he had just

wrestled a bear.

 

The first thing that may come to mind is he was having an afternoon cavort

with his assistant, but he had a glass window on one side of his office

and several support staff surrounding his workspace, so I gathered this

was his customary work attire.

 

Most of what he said to me traveled in one ear and out the other because I

was too busy trying to tame the battle going on in my head ...

 

“If he cares that little about his appearance and is that sloppy in his

own business, why would he be any different with my finances?”

 

“Laurie, your colleague recommended him and said he did good work, that’s

got to count for something.”

 

This internal battle dominated our meeting and I left with a pit in my

stomach.

 

In the months that followed, I stayed on top of him like a wild dog on a

slab of meat.  I didn’t trust his judgment or quality of work. I watched

every entry he made like a hawk and double-checked everything he did.

 

I eventually brought the relationship to an end and transferred my

business to another accountant.

 

Maybe it was shallow and terribly unfair, but the fact remains --

appearance does have a major impact on business relationships.

 

I couldn’t get past my first impression or the subsequent impressions as I

continued to visit his office, and if I didn’t call and ask for something,

or put a deadline on it, I don’t know if it would have been done.

 

His poor professional image translated to substandard përformance and

unfortunately, the two are often connected, and that’s where our

perceptions and judgments come into play.

 

An eternal truth in business is, you will succeed based on what is, not on

what it should be.

 

Physical appearance and its impact on business success has been tested and

measured and you can try it out for yourself to demonstrate.

 

One day, dress casual for meeting prospects and arrive in your aging

pick-up truck. The next day, wear a business suit and complement it with

accessories like a good quality pen, briefcase and your newer model car.

 

You’ll notice a remarkable difference in the results you produce.

 

You’ll also notice that you’re treated with more respect, courtesy and

receive much better service and response than you are when dressed in your

“at home” business clothes.

 

The importance of personal packaging is a fact of business life.  It may

seem unfair or superficial, but the fact remains -- to resist, deny or

ignore it would be disastrous to your success.

 

Take a few moments to reflect on how you’re presenting yourself to the

world. Is there room for improvement? If so, make a change and test it.

I’m certain you’ll be impressed by the results.

Origin Author:  Laurie Hayes

12 Easy Ways to Organize your Home Life

12 Easy Ways to Organize your  Home Life

I admit it! Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the seemingly endless  streams of paperwork. Emails I want to keep, Ezines or sections of them, ideas I found on the Internet, school papers, notes of ideas that popped into my head as I was waiting to have a tooth  filled, newspaper clippings ... EEEK! I would file and file and  file and then forgot where that article was that I needed to  complete the project that was due last Thursday!

I have been an avid list-maker all my life out of necessity,  juggling a 9 to 5 work life, family time, a home business and  taking care of two houses; as well as having a number of hobbies

such as cartooning and fine art, clothing design and creation,  crafts and ballroom dancing (at one point in my life even being  a competitive ballroom dancer for 5 years as well as an

assistant disk jockey for parties). (no stress!)

For all of you super-busy people I have put together some handy  hints on getting your life in order and keeping your sanity.

1) Notables: Keep a small notebook and pen handy, wherever you  are, to jot down ideas or appointments or things to do instead  of trying to remember them later on.

2) Telephonery: Set a time limit to each phone call and make  sure you tell your caller. That way you save yourself the stress  of trying to end the phone call and it also helps the caller to

condense the information they want you to hear.

3) In Waiting Use waiting time at the dentist, meeting with your boss or while waiting on your roast to cook to catch up on reading or planning, or use the time to tidy up, filing or other

tasks.

4) Help Wanted: Be sure to offer praise to a subordinate, co-worker or to a member of the family for any effort you've noticed - they'll be happy to help you when you're bogged down.

5) Don't Put It Off! If you procrastinate you'll only get  stressed out when you think about that hateful "to do" item on your list. You'll blow it out of proportion in your mind and it'll become almost impossible to accomplish. Make sure you tackle the largest or most disliked job first, dividing it up into manageable tasks, then the other jobs will be a breeze!

6) Control Bug Delegate the tasks you have no time for or team  up with someone who can help you. (see tip #4!)

7) Group Effort Save time and footwork by collecting everything  to bring with you to complete errands or to distribute in each  room of the house instead of making too many trips. Make a fast  list while planning out your route and be sure to plan each stop  along the way so you don't have to backtrack and lose time.

8) Schedule Fun Time! Make sure you include some personal time  for YOU. Allot some time in your agenda - make an appointment  for yourself and keep it, even if it's only a leisurly 20 minute  bubble bath or a 15 minute walk in the fresh spring air!

9) Space Freebies Go through any old unneeded files to free up  space in your filing system.

10) Once and Only Once Each piece of paper should be handled  only once. Read it and either file it, redirect it to someone  else, schedule it or toss it. Don't add it to an ever-ending

pile on your desk in hopes that you'll get to it eventually.

11) Post-Master Use sticky notes to write errands needed to be done. Stick them to your front door to remind you as you're headed out.

12) Systems Engineer Too much time is wasted everyday on  searching for things. Find a system that works for you and your  lifestyle and apply it. Use it religiously and you'll find new

time slots you thought you never had!

Author: Heather Diodati

Dad/Mom, do You Have The Time?

Dad/Mom, do You Have The Time?

How often do we hear the complaint in the home  “I haven’t got time” ?

“I haven’t got time to explain it to you, son" 

“I haven’t got time to discuss that. You will just have to accept my word for it.”

“I didn’t have time to prepare for this meeting.”

“I can’t stop for lunch. I have too much to do.”

You must have heard every one of these statements at some time or another. You have probably made some of them yourself. And  every one of them is a result of failure on someone’s part to organize their time correctly.

Time is a resource like any other and it must be managed. If it is wasted, it is gone forever. Once it has been used, it cannot be re-used. It is finite and limited. You cannot make more of

it, but you can use it better. This is about your family, please care of about it.

Your Family Life - Your Family Values

Everyone has things in their life they value. Some people value family and community, others value wealth and having fun. There are no right or wrong answers when it comes to values, they just are. Regardless of what you value, all values adhere to one fundamental truth: the more you align your life’s activities to your values, the happier you will be.

Consider Sue, a successful real estate agent and mother of 2 pre-teen boys. One of Sue’s stated goals was to become the top real estate agent in her region. While she was making good progress towards achieving that goal she still was unhappy; something was missing. Sue began working with a coach to focus on her personal development.

What she discovered was one of her top values was family, not career as she had been assuming. Her conflict quickly became obvious: her children were home in the evenings and on the weekend - peak hours for real estate agents are evenings and weekends. Sue realized she had some choices to make.

So how do your values and goals line up? What are things that you SAY are important to you? Do your actions support those things? Do you feel like there is a disconnect in your life?

Take a few moments to list all of the things that you consider important. Some ideas include family, career, spirituality, life-long learning, having fun, helping others, and the list
goes on. Prioritize you top 3. Now pull out your day planner; are your daily activities supporting those 3 values? What can you do to reorient your life around your values?

Author: Myrtis Smith

Homeschooling A teenager

Homeschooling A teenager

As children start maturing into adults, parents may feel insecure about homeschooling. Many parents then discontinue the homeschooling process and happily hand over the reign to outside
authorities.

But is this really necessary?
Is the strictly compartmentalized education provided in schools a better option?

If social concerns are worrying you, look for interest-oriented associations, clubs and societies. These offer a lot of support for leaders, opportunity for shared experience, and foster a
sense of belonging.

Make up your own group or share this responsibility with someone else. Home education support groups provide fantastic opportunities to meet your child's needs. This
is the best way to develop intelligent, self-motivated, healthy and able young people.

If the growing burden of some of the higher level Math or Science seems to be beyond you, enlist the help of someone who knows more. You can even barter your own services and thus save
some money. With homeschooling becoming more and more popular, support groups will have innumerable resources that help you find the right teacher for your child.

The underlying principle that guides homeschooling is this: any child has the innate capacity to grow, develop and achieve its full potential. All it needs is the right environment and all
the right answers. Be there to provide these and think twice before you turn over this responsibility to a third party.

Author: Valerie Garner

10 tips for Headshot photography for your child

When you've hired a professional photographer to take photos of

your little one, there are a few things you can do to make sure

your child is well-prepared for the experience. As any parent

already knows, sometimes it can be really difficult to get your

child (or children) to stay still long enough to pose for one

picture, let alone dozens. If you follow a few simple rules

though, you'll have happier child, better pictures and plenty of

them!

1: For children under the age of 6, one of the most important

things to do is to make sure they've had a nap before the

photo-shoot. Even if they don't normally sleep during the day,

in this case, make an exception. A tired kid is usually an

impatient and cranky kid. Difficult enough for a parent to deal

with; nearly impossible for a photographer to manage.

2: Feed your child first and have food ready in case they need a

snack during the photo-shoot. For kids of any age (and lots of

adults too), a full stomach makes a lot of difference to

improving a mood and improving the ability to focus for more

than a minute or two.

3: Don't give your kid food or drinks that are proven

hyper-energy boosters... No sugar and no caffeine before or

during the shoot! This means no pop, nothing with ketchup, no

sugary cereals, no cookies and so on. Hyper kids are even more

difficult to photograph than tired or cranky kids.

4: Be sure to explain clearly to your child about the

photo-shoot before you even meet up with your photographer. Tell

them the photographer's name; explain what will be happening and

why the pictures are being taken. Very important to explain, is

that they need to listen to what the photographer is asking them

to do. (Such as how to pose, or to look at the camera or to hold

still, etc.)

5: Never, never, never leave your child unattended with a

photographer, unless it's someone you already know and trust.

Other than the obvious safety reasons, it's just common sense

that a child in a strange or new situation should be accompanied

at all times by a parent or guardian.

6: During the shoot, unless the photographer specifically asks

you to, try not to direct your child too much. Although it's

instinctive that you'll want to, it really is best to let the

photographer be in charge of the situation as much as possible.

Assuming you've hired someone with experience photographing

children, you should be able to relax and trust that they know

what they're doing, and that includes how to direct your child

for the best possible results.

7: Before your shoot, be sure to take a few minutes to let your

child get comfortable being around the photographer before the

camera comes out. Again, an experienced child photographer knows

it's important to establish a rapport with the little ones

before starting the photo-session. Even ten minutes of your

photographer talking to the child - or with very young children,

just getting them used to the sound of a new voice - will make a

big difference in the quality and tone of your child's session.

8: Be sure to give your child a few breaks during the session.

Bring a few of their favourite small toys with you. If you've

booked more than half an hour (most sessions are 60 to 90

minutes at least), then take them for a 5 minute walk halfway

through. If you're somewhere outdoors, let them run and play for

a few minutes. If you're in your home, let them play in their

room or in your yard for a short while. A good child

photographer not only won't mind, they'll encourage you to do

this. Again, a happy child is much easier to take pictures of

than an unhappy one.

9: A simple thing but sometimes an overlooked one, is to be sure

your child has gone to the washroom right before the shoot. And

if they haven't, then be sure to take at least one washroom

break - even if your child doesnt ask for one - during your

session. Many children are too shy to ask to go to the bathroom

if they're around a stranger or in a strange situation. If your

child is still in diapers, make sure they're clean and dry at

all times during the shoot. If they need a diaper change, don't

hesitate to take the time. Child photographers know to expect

this, so don't worry about taking the time to do it.

10: If, despite all your best efforts, your child is in no mood

for a photo-shoot and is fussy, or crying non-stop or just won't

be still or calm, don't try to force the situation. Reschedule.

Your photographer will still need to be compensated for their

time, even if they can't take the photos you hired them for. The

sooner you decide it's better to reschedule, the less time

you'll need to pay the photographer for being in a situation

where they're unable to do their job. Although it might end up

costing you a bit more than you'd bargained for, if the photos

of your child are important to you, rescheduling with the same

photographer will be worth it.

About the author:

Tamea Burd is a professional photographer based in Vancouver,

BC. Known for the warm, artistic style of her images, Tamea

specializes in wedding photography and portrait photography

Name Your Baby Right and Make Them a Millionaire

What is it in a name that makes it better than another? How can

you assure the name you choose for your baby will bring them

success?

Across cultures and ages, one's given name has been regarded

with great importance. Sarah, the wife of Abraham changed her

name from Sari due to the fact that she was barren and God asked

her to change her name. In Buddhism a person picks a name as a

symbol of his new beginning. What is it in a name that is so

important?

Studies were done in the US that prove that individuals with

popular Anglo-Saxon names usually have more successful lives

than people with minority names. The article "A Roshanda by Any

Other Name?" published in the book "Freakonomics: A Rogue

Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything." (Ekelund Jr.,

Robert B., Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers, 2005) suggests

that minority and exceptional names are guaranteed to make the

person less successful. Studies have also been conducted showing

that whether a person gets called for an interview is influenced

by the name on the resume. Some names are commonly avoided,

while others are chosen often for potential employees.

Each culture or ethnicity has their own view on what it is in a

name that can make it successful. Religious parents often name

their babies after saints, Biblical figures, Islamic figures or

any religion affiliated with them.

What is deemed as success today is closely tied with our

corporate culture. A recent BBC article explores the trend of

naming babies  after trademarks. 

People have actually named their babies Ford, Armani, Del-Monte, and

Channel. According to Professor Evans of Bellevue University in Nebraska, 

these people chose the names they did because they are associated 

with wealth and glamour. 

The second reason is the desire of the parents to give their

child a name which will stand out.

Choosing the right name could give your child a head start in

life, or it can cause a lifetime of scrutiny as one of our

readers stated, "I agree that names should not matter.

Unfortunately, they do." You cannot please everyone. The best

advice is to give your baby a name that has personal

significance and one that you will enjoy calling out seemingly

endless times throughout your life.

Author: Neta Shemesh 

The Declaration of Your Family

The Declaration of Your Family

Why only Corporate or state have the declaration? The family must have too.
Maybe its very important, because its related to the family value. Our familly value

Maybe we have lost sight of our own horizon. While a nation of participants turned into a loose collection of spectators, the business morphed into a monster of business. Instead of "In God We Trust", on our money, money is now the god we trust [the love of $money$ having replaced real love].

Why the value not just applied to our family, with our declaration?
Maybe the same, In God We Trust, our declaration to our family. Its not just slogan, but its our family value. Its our principle for the parent, for the children.

Let us change our mind to the better, to something that works, as outlined in our family document, photo, sign, etc. "In God We Trust", The Declaration of Independence, Happy Family etc

It's time for us to re-invent itself before it implodes on the iceberg of materialism and greed.

This is about YOUR family

Our family is important to us. Maybe they are the reason for us to life. We job, we do all the best for our fam. Knowledge for develop the better family may be is your choice, for the new better family, not just like ordinary.